Trust &more

So this blog is basically a collaboration of thoughts I've had these past few days but haven't had a chance to write because of finals.


Oh &read the post before this if you haven't. I posted this one and the previous one on the same day.

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So wanna hear something I now think is crazy?
I used to be that girl who, once I meet someone, they have my automatic trust. Like I never even had to bother to get to know them better. Idk... I just trusted them. But maybe it was then that I didn't know exactly what trust was. To tell you the truth, I still don't really know what trust is. You know how there is really no way to know what love is until you feel it? Well I think there is no exact definition for trust. Maybe it was just that my trust in other people was less than the trust someone else needs. Like I didn't need so much from one person; they didn't have to really prove anything to me to get my trust. Hard to explain. So within the last month, I'd say starting in the beginning of May--May 3rd to be exact--my trust in the world completely collapsed. Maybe I needed this horrible experience to teach me what trust is... because I sure learned how much trust means to me and how fragile it can be. I questioned everyone around me & (as I said before) the world gave me so many reasons. Reasons for what, you ask? I'm not quite sure either because it was reasons for life in general. One was reasons to no longer trust anyone. Reasons to as why my friends are my friends & if/why I should keep them. Reasons to how I could have been so naive in thinking that I can trust everyone. Reasons to why bestfriends are bestfriends & what it means to be one. I seriously always thought Talia was interesting (haha) to not have anyone to trust, but I really do get what she means now. There is so much more to trust than a friendly person when I first meet them. I think that's what I used to base my trust on, but now I see you may actually never know the genuiness of the trust, sometimes for 9 years. I've given trust a completely opposite definition from what I used to think it was, and sure it has definitely affected how I look on many of my friendships, but I think it's really for the better. I mean, I don't analyze my friends to see if they're trustworthy or not (because I believe overanalyzing friends and their actions is extremely stupid), but I think about it more than I used to. I think it's improved what I think of other people and how I handle situations. Although the results may sometimes be negative, it's totally worth the maturity in the end.

Speaking of analyzing friends' actions, I think people who analyze a bit too deeply into their friends' actions need to let it go. Friends are friends and you don't need to analyze them. I find it rude and dumb, considering they're your friends--so why wouldn't you already know them? There is no need to look at every single thing they do and take it personally. Sometimes things just have to work out that way, and there is nothing you or your friend can do about it. You needa understand that. Friends take the time to understand and listen... they don't analyze. Got it?

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Insecurity is caused by fear.
So damn freaking true.
You know it.
I don't feel it necessary to explain it cuz it's self-explanatory.
I'm pretty sure you all know what I mean.

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Lizzy's away message:

"True, genuine friends are hard to find nowadays.. so appreciate what you have. In the past few months, rather the past 4 DAYS, I've learned that it doesn't matter how much you talk to or see a friend; if that person is a TRUE friend, then none of that should matter... because in the end, you know they'll be there for you no matter what..."

That's how I define friends and bestfriends. You don't measure your relationship with a bestfriend on how much you guys talk and what you guys know about each others' recent events. Sure, it's definitely important, no doubt; but what really counts are the times you guys choose to be there for each other and that you guys will always be there even if you hadn't talked in a million years. Bestfriendships last a lifetime. &Even if they seem to be dropped over months, you know that person's your bestfriend because you can always come back to them and it would never be awkward because the connection between you guys will be restored instantly.

I have a bestfriend, &I know she's here to stay. [:





Mmkay. So there's more stuff to talk about, but I'ma leave off here because it's already too much to read.


El fin.






Don't forget to read the post underneath here!
Because you just love my writing so much. Haha.